In the absence of Maitree bhav (friendliness)pointing out flaws and deficiencies (giving negative feed back) becomes very difficult. It is often done very dis functionally, sometimes very rudely or in the person's absence. Often to buy peace we give the opposite feed back; like saying, "no problem" when we are actually disturbed.
In such situations it is advisable to pause for a while to develop friendliness before giving feed back. It takes the sharpness off our statements and helps the other to receive it without feeling threatened.
Ganoba
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